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Kids Born Out Of Mixed Parentage

August 9, 2017

Kids born out of mixed parentage can be geniuses. Must have something to do with the DNA mixing from two entirely different gene pools. This I have seen in my family, in the case of my friends and relatives.

Out-of-caste (love) marriages were not unheard of even in my parents’ generation. Inter-religious marriages are also common now in India although we don’t look at them kindly anymore like we happened to a few years back. Inter-religious marriages mean, door closes from the Hindu side forever. One hundred percent. Conversion has never been allowed in Hinduism but is happening lately. Very rigid compared to Christianity or Islam where conversions are norm and too very easy and acceptable especially upon marriage. The main reason you have to be born a Hindu and cannot convert into one is that, your gotra comes to you by genetic inheritance, something that cannot be acquired on conversion. This is what sets Hindus apart from Abrahamic followers.

Of course Hinduism is now a universal faith with followers from all around the world. No more is Sanathana Dharma limited by genetic factors or geographic boundaries in this modern age.

Inter-caste and inter-state marriages are happening in a big way in India now.

My mother was a working woman over 50 years back – in the year 1965. When it was not really fashionable for womenfolk to work. She completed her PU from Stella Maris College. Yet our family used to be very conservative. My parents lived in the same street from childhood but had never spoken to each other. They were from the same community. Theirs was an arranged marriage. I remember my mother telling me, when my parents were newly married, they still went to cinema accompanied by an adult (my father’s grandfather)!!! My Mother-in-law used to smirk at me saying, how she had to talk to my father-in-law always from behind the doors and never in the living room directly (this comment for her son and me sitting rubbing (!)  next to each other in the sofa watching tv)  in the joint family. Only when they were alone finally in a nuclear family, she could talk straight to him in the face without an intruding elderly family member.

The interesting story my MIL keeps telling me is, how my FIL used to come and pinch her in the foot at night because the whole family with grandparents to little nephew-nieces lay side by side in a single row in the big hall to sleep. It was their secret signal! Bedrooms were meant for only changing clothes. My MIL used to tiptoe to the upper floor when the entire extended joint family slid into a deep sleep in the midnight hour! Sometimes a great grandma could sneeze and spoil my in-laws nightly rendezvous plans! This is the way my MIL  conceived 5 kids in 10 years from 1955 to 1965 !!! I used to tease her that if not for this censorship, she would have littered a dozen!

At one point of time, in my in-laws’ big ancestral house, at least 4 branch families lived together as a colossus joint family comprising of nearly 60 to 80 family members! Where was the question of privacy. But this also fostered a good understanding between couples and brought them together in an unpredictable way. Husbands and wives learned to read each others’ mind even in a crowd across the hall way, mastered the sign language and could decipher the shift of eyebrows. Today this basic understanding is something that most in our generation with total privacy lack.

Comparatively both my parents came from smallest sized families. My mother and aunt were only two sisters. My grandfather underwent vasectomy in the 1940s before independence after the birth of my aunt. He told this to me myself saying he never wanted a son and wanted to stop with 2 daughters. A revolution in those days. He was a B.Com., graduate who had graduated in the 1920s from the famed Loyola College. Yet, my grandfather wanted his daughters to work only as school teachers and serve the country. My aunt got selected to work for Reserve Bank and my mother for Electricity Board, but my grandfather refused to let them work with men !!! Sometimes I can’t believe this contradiction from the man who underwent family planning surgery because he was happy and contented with his two daughters and did not want a son, a feat in the 1940s. Neither did he force family planning on my granny who begot my mom in her 13th year but could still read and write English, Tamil and Telugu (thanks to her neighbours) even in that tender age! I had a super granny whose morning habit included reading the print newspaper The Hindu.

My granny told me, once my mother was listening to transistor radio so intently and humming to herself an old Tamil picture song of actress Padmini. Must have been late 1950s. My grandfather came riding home silently in his Bajaj scooter. (My grandfather rode his scooter from his teens until the late 1980s when he was over 60 years). My mother never heard the scooter sound. She never saw her father entering the wide open door and gazing at her. From behind, my grandfather took the radio from my mother’s hand and off he went in the scooter again. He sold the radio that same day to someone. My mother cried that night into her pillows. She was in her teens. The very word called ‘cinema’ could not enter our house. Still my grandfather encouraged his daughters to pursue their education and made them high school teachers. My mother underwent special training to teach deaf and dumb kids. By 16-17 years, both my mother and aunt were independent women working as teachers capable of taking care of themselves. They took a public bus to school and were not expected to hand over their pay packets to their parents.

India is like that. When you look at the academic and career achievements of our women, you may think we are rebels or we are ultra progressive. Yes, in most ways. But when it comes to social or familial life and connected responsibilities, forget the jean-clad Indian women. We will be the first to light the diya and touch the feet of our in-laws in sheer respect (and also some fear)! My sister used to tell me how the Mumbai girls were totally different from how Bollywood portrayed them. They would be wandering around in minis and micros and pointed heels but the moment the Saas came home, they would transform into the dutiful bahus observing numerous fasts every month, performing every other puja, cooking up  feasts for their extended family, etc., etc.

Mixed marriages may be exemptions from this stereo-type but not necessarily. A friend of mine married a muslim but has raised his entire (lower middle class) family to admirable levels. One more cousin of mine is also married to a muslim. She comes home but none of us do visit her.

Otherwise there are a number of inter-caste marriages in both friends and relatives circles. As the married parties are mostly Hindus, there haven’t been a problem although there may some adjustment issues. There are now even north-south unions. Earlier, south girls used to be looked down upon as kind of inferior because of the dusky skin tone. Presently the scene is totally changed. South Indian brides are going places literally these days. Won over people not with looks but with books! As caste and regional-state and language barriers break down in India slowly but steadily, the modern mantra is ‘any Hindu!’ This is a very healthier scene and choice. The Rishis cannot get more happy.

My distant relatives had had their daughters, sons marrying foreigners. A boy married a Friench girl. A girl married an American white boy. So we have broken all thresholds I must say!

Kids, I have seen, born to inter-caste parents are very brainy. Very high IQ levels.

I had an arranged marriage only. I never knew my husband prior to March 7, 1993 and we married on June 23. But after marriage we discovered a few very distant relations between our two families. This is because, we are marrying within same community for generations. So it is possible that our blood lines have criss-crossed somewhere before – may be generations back. Whichever Senguntha Mudaliar I may meet in Chennai could be somehow related to me these days! It is alarming! Really! If we investigate deeply, we may end up finding a connection!!!

Same Gotra marriages are not allowed in Hinduism (entire north and in some sections of south). First cousin marriage is strictly forbidden among Hindus, considered incestuous. But down south, if the gotras are different you can marry your (cross) cousin. For example, straight cousins cannot marry each other. Like the children of brothers. Children of sisters. But a brother’s son or daughter can marry his sister’s daughter or son. Cross cousin marriages are permitted because, the sister gets married and goes to another family/gotra. She assumes the gotra of her husband’s family tree. Her children born under new gotra in a strange family will be inheriting different gotra/Y chromosomes, not that of her parents. So the children can marry back into her parents’ family.

But north or south, not even the second cousin marriage is permissible between straight cousin (between children of brothers’ male cousins and children of sisters’ girl cousins). All straight cousins in north and (with cross cousin exemption) in south be it first cousins or second cousins or third cousins cannot marry.

My north Indian friends used to tease me relentlessly about this proven logic. They would be shocked by the south indian custom that allowed cross cousin marriages. But let me assure you, even these cross cousin marriages mostly stopped with the last or my generation. Not many of my parents generation had cross cousin marriages. One of my friends married her cross cousin. In my generation it was minimal, almost non existent. Now it is totally off. Full stop. Whether it is love marriage or arranged marriage in India, we can be more than certain that there is not the least chance of someone marrying from within the same gotra. We have outgrown that custom in south for our own sake. Awareness of genetic health issues made it possible for south Indians to put an end to cross cousin marriages as we have been a lot more literate for ages compared to north. We needed no written law.

https://www.quora.com/Why-do-some-people-oppose-marriages-within-the-same-%E2%80%9Cgothra%E2%80%9D

Why are same gotra marriages prohibited in Hinduism. This is the scientific reason. Straight cousin marriages will lead to harmful gene mutations and congenital defects thereby. For ‘vamsavridhi’ or for the family clan to grow, ancient Hindus wanted their offsprings to marry outside their home families into other blood lines so that the gene pools could get freshly recharged.

Cross cousin marriages where the gotra changes for daughters of the family after marriage was considered slightly safer which is why they were allowed in south. Even in south, straight first cousin marriages are considered taboo and incestuous. In north one hundred percent, first cousin marriages are prohibited even today. If you marry a woman of same gotra, it means you are marrying your own sister because you and she may have descended from the same gene pool whose Alpha male originally could be the same ancestor. It is like blasphemy therefore for Hindus to marry cousins.

However even that is changing these days. Where a population exceeds a billion, who can trace whose gene to where???

There are no more unwritten codes that anyone has to adhere too. Rarely some love marriages bring a boy and girl of same gotra together. It is now tolerated because mostly even in such cases, the girl and the boy may be totally unrelated by blood in these modern times!

We don’t know what future has in store for us.

I can say, marrying within community, even if not of same gotra, has led the Hindu gene pool to go stale somewhat. This is why I believe, we Indians today are not as smart as our ancestors, the ancient Hindus.

Now as we see, the inter-caste marriages are producing brilliant hybrid kids (and even some RASCALS)!

My son will be of marriageable age in a few more years. So what about him? I know I cannot decide for him but if he decides to opt for arranged marriage, of course we will look within community first. But in recent years, we are also looking at arranged inter-caste match for him with any of our friends’ daughters. Have not ruled out both options. BUT DEFINITELY NOT IN BLOOD RELATIVES CIRCLES. For the first time however, I may or may not take up my son’s horoscope. Neither my parents nor my in-laws were blood related before they married. 

I wouldn’t be thinking about it, but my friend out of the blue suggested that, I should place my beta’s horoscope first in our Kuladeivam temple (Family deity) (in an Arni village) before taking it out to study for his marriage or career prospects. I take it as a command from my Mother Goddess Herself. So i have decided to do just that. Whether or not I may consult his horoscope, I have decided to get the blessings from my Mother for him for his future.

But whoever my son chooses as his life partner – be it a Hindu or Christian or Muslim, an Indian or whichever nationality, of whichever race, of whichever tongue Tamil or Hindi or whatever, as a mother, I will only welcome my daughter-in-law as my own daughter into my home and hearth. I of course have laid 2 conditions for my son should it be a love marriage (i) the girl must be a Hindu (ii) the girl must be at least one day YOUNGER than him. Any Indian state okay. Any Hindu caste okay. Any mother tongue okay. But this is just a word of caution as a mother.

It is too early to think on these lines anyway…

Let us see…

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What a super race ancient Hindus were. To what extent they thought and practised religion scientifically. What are Abrahamic folds before the ancient Hindu wisdom! Which one of them even thought about something close to Gotras for gene preservation as our ancestors did. Today we are talking about DNA and genetics, but without using names our forefathers still somehow figured it out exactly as we know genetic science today a few thousands of years back. Their X and Y chromosome knowledge base is awesome although they never labelled them so. By deigning the first cousin marriages as taboo and incestuous, our Hindu ancestors effectively prevented undesirable inbreeding.

It is not a fluke that Hindus are a universally acknowledged pedigree intelligent race (in spite of the creeping element of mediocrity within us). It is by having lived such a disciplined and scientific and spiritual life for generations spanning centuries, millenniums, we are what we are today. And perhaps this must also serve to be a reason for us to have inter-caste marriages within Hindus irrespective of castes-communities-states-languages in this present age, but NEVER with other race/religion people. Here we can learn from the Japanese and even Germans. Hindu gene pools are carefully cultivated and nurtured for eons. PEDIGREE BREEDING.

By eliminating the degradation of Y chromosomes with cancelling out the first cousin marriages through history and thus successfully eliminating inbreeding within the population, Hindus have been enriching the gene pool from mutation-deterioration over ages. Even today irrespective of any caste or creed, you cannot find a first cousin marriage in any corner of India among Hindus speaking any language. Blasphemous, incestuous for us. Something that Islam does not practise and will never so because first cousin marriages are the norm of their society leading to absolute dilution of the Y chromosomes leading to widespread congenital abnormalities. Could be the reason for the bhais’ low IQ???

 

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